Saturday, July 26, 2014

The Greatest Gift I'll Ever Give {an update and a thank you}

I have shared a few times with you all my journey of becoming a gestational carrier for my cousin and his wife, and a few belly shots along the way.  If you missed them you can read about it here and here.  If you follow me on Instagram you've seen a few more updates and moments.  I wanted to give a little update today because this road is about to come to an end.  We are currently 36 1/2 weeks along and only have 2 1/2 weeks til induction day.  We have it all scheduled in the hopes that all goes to plan so that this little guys parents make it from the East Coast for the most special day of their lives...the day they become parents.  I am feeling a bit of stress because of this situation.  It is what really separates this experience from my own two pregnancies and births.  With my own pregnancies I had the mentality of "sure, I wouldn't mind if I went into labor before hitting 40 weeks.  That would be awesome!"  This time around it is more like "STAY IN THERE BUDDY!"  With this technically being my 3rd pregnancy we all know nature can take it's course and anything can happen.  I am just trying my darnedest to sit and rest often, when those braxton hicks kick up in the afternoon daily I sit there a pray that they go away.  I have so many emotions about this upcoming experience because it is a bit of the unknown.  I want to make sure all parties are taken care of and that we all come out of this healthy.  I am hoping for a smooth delivery soon to be followed by a swift recovery because my kids are really ready for their bouncing around, fast moving mommy to be back.  My kiddos have been champs through out this journey.  My son understands what is going on and I have appreciated his maturity involved in this.  Yes, he's been frustrated and a bit "difficult" too because he just wants me to be able to do what I used to do on a daily basis, but he's 7, I have to understand that he can't fully understand this situation.  I just want to make sure that at the end of this all he has the right amount of closure with the experience.  If that means seeing this little guy, then that is what we'll do. My daughter is a bit young.  She knows the baby in my belly isn't ours, that it is my cousins and his wife's, she knows his name and talks to him often.  We have just reminded her through out this entire time that he'd be going home with his mommy and daddy once he was big and strong enough to come out of mommy's belly.  I just hope we are able to give them both the kind of ending that they expect to this journey.  With kids it is always hard to know the real emotions they are feeling and how to address them properly.  I just hope my husband and I can pull through and make this an easy transition back to "normal" life.  As for my husband...he's been a rock star!  Not many men could watch their wives carry the baby of someone else, let's be honest.  He, on the other hand, was game from the start that this is family and of course we would do this for them.  He then was there through every step of the way...I'm talking legal contracts, meeting with psychologists, medical exams, administering my injections, watching me in such pain because of them, really stepping up in December when I could barely get out of bed and then just being there through out the course of a full pregnancy.  We are almost at the end and I just know we will be such a stronger unit because of this.  I know I haven't always been easy through out this pregnancy because it isn't ours, the responsibility just felt larger.  It's been quite the road and as much as I've enjoyed it, I'm ready for the end to come.  I'm ready to see my cousin and his wife as parents, and know that that is because of me, I'm ready to not be pregnant anymore, I'm ready to have a drink (let's be real), I'm ready to pick my kids up again and spin them around, I'm ready to sleep on my belly at night, I'm ready to be ME again.  This situation takes a lot and really isn't for the weak.  You give all of yourself to the reason behind this journey and for however long it takes to get a successful pregnancy test and full term pregnancy, you really are at the direction of others.  I knew that coming into this and I was completely on board and ready.  I'm am now 36 1/2 weeks pregnant and just tired.  Like any woman at the end of a pregnancy, especially one ending during the summer, you are just ready for it to be over.  I am ready to see the look on my cousin and his wife's face and on their families when this little miracle baby arrives.  I'm ready to get my huge pat on the back!  And I'm ready to say to myself...
"great job girl, you did it!  You are the ROCK STAR!"  

35 weeks



36 weeks


The start of maternity leave yesterday!

1 comment:

  1. Such an amazing gift you are giving. What a wonderful thing for your children to witness . . . unconditional kindness and giving. Congrats and I hope everything went well with the delivery and the transition for your family goes smoothly

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